April 25, 2011 Fall of hope – @onestoppoetry – forms example
Come to me thy sweet death follow by sword held
Traveler from Roland’s hand to mine in blood borne
See the souls flee before the merciless sword takes their life
The kiss of angels the bite of demons Durandal bears well
This savior of the last bastion of hope does spray life’s blood
My arm tires not from this fight as our ground is red and bright
Come softly to me sweet death for this dream made life
A right fight against dark forces might where we stand in the light
Others scream at this demon in red yet I remain your heart love
Know that as we stand and die in waning light a darkening twilight
My love, heart, and soul remain forever yours for my tomorrows are done
This land will grow on blood spent well today shall bring the future’s harvest
Tags: Death, Epic, Knight of the Heart, knightsheart, love, onestoppoetry, Poetry, Sean Vessey, seanotd, timeless
- 8 comments
- Posted under Blog, Poetry, Uncategorized
Permalink # Gay said
Well this was a beautiful poem made of many kinds of feet. There are a fair number of trochees and I thought a few dactyls but also a sprinkling of iambs and anapests as in the last two lines which are imabic ending in an anapest. You can see why everyone talks about how difficult it is to sustain this unnatural and inverted rhythm for English. But it is useful as you have done here to make certain words jump out and speak to the reader. Really well done!
Permalink # knightsheart said
Thank you, Gay. I appreciate your comments.
Permalink # dani said
amazing! ♥
Permalink # knightsheart said
Thank you Dani. I appreciate your comments
Permalink # moondustwriter said
It feels like a historical moment occurs in your poem – the reader solemnly waits for the end.
Nicely done Sean
Permalink # knightsheart said
Yes a desperate struggle and a last wish . Thank you, Leslie
Permalink # shayrul said
I love this line which is so perfect and so sad, “My love, heart, and soul remain forever yours for my tomorrows are done”
Permalink # knightsheart said
Thank you Cheryl. That is my favorite line in this poem. I am glad you like it.